Monday, June 28, 2010

NOT LONGER POWERED BY THE AIR WE BREATHE

One year ago today we lost a great man, a great entertainer... oh wait, excuse me:

ONE YEAR AGO TODAY WE LOST A GREAT MAN
Bla bla bla yes I know the joke is old. But June 28th, 2009 was a real shocker. I thought at first the reports of his death were a joke. As more and more came in on the news feeds I realized we all were going to miss out on some truely epic and, more importantly, new products that he would hock. We'll still have the nostalgia of seeing his previous products like this one:


Wait just one fucking second, I've see this before. Holy SHIT! I HAVE seen it before

That's it, that's what happened. Billy didn't die from Oxycleaning his nose, causing him to have a heart attack. Vince offed him in a fit of rage over having the same damn product.



In all actuality, I had seen Billy's version of the producted at the Kitchen Pile several times. In fact seeing it there was the idea for naming the post about Vince Shalomi. Every time I tried getting a pic of the box, thought, I kept missing. Thought about even buying one, just to say that I have one. Anyways, may the man rest in peace. He gave me many laughs at his expense, hell I think he wants those laughs. As someone once told me: If you don't have haters you're not doing it right.

Friday, June 25, 2010

Driving Grandpa around in the La-Z-Boy



I love the "used parts" painted on the side. Make me think they're driving the guy to the ER and he has an organ donor card XD

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

McChrystal Relieved: How it couldn't happen any other way

I'd like to start off by saying that I think this General is now going to become a martyr for the right. But, as it were, there's not a whole lot this asshole could do to keep his job. Let me explain.

Article 88 of the Uniform code of Military Justice clearly states:

Any commissioned officer who uses contemptuous words against the President, the Vice President, Congress, the Secretary of Defense, the Secretary of a military department, the Secretary of Homeland Security, or the Governor or legislature of any State, Commonwealth, or possession in which he is on duty or present shall be punished as a court-martial may direct.
So, I want you to reimagine this for a second. Actually, screw that I'm going to tell you the most sure fire way to get fired.

Get yourself a nice PA system. Something that can broadcast, oh say, at least a city block or more. Moreover I also want you to have the cash on hand to post a few press releases in your local newspaper. Now, I need you to set up that PA system around your place of employment (or former employment, given the state of the economy -_- ). Now, pick out a busy day at said employment, fire (pardon the pun) the PA. Now I want you to say just about the nastiest things you can about your boss. Maybe even his boss, or some middle managers between you and him. I want you about as contemtuous as you can be in your comments. I also want you to write it all down, and buy some ads in your local paper and reprint your words there. Now, sit back. Count how long it takes for you to get fired. Shit, count how long until your bosses sue you for slandar.

Pulling back from the hypothetical and diving into reality: McChrystal is a dumbass. He damn well knew his words were going to be printed. He basically was up for court marshal over this, but Obama gave him an out. Either way it could have gone (Court Marshal, Fired, or Resignation) his infamous wisdom became a CLM.

It should also be noted that he wanted to increase troop levels in Afghanistan, polar to what Obama (shit, THE US PEOPLE) want to do. If he had played it smart he wouldn't have been taken down like this, raked through the mud by everyone.






[Edit] Here's a prime example of what McChrystal did, in civvie terms

Monday, June 21, 2010

Times Square bomb suspect pleads guilty

Interesting. Faisal Shazad pleaded guilty. No plea bargain, no "nope I'm not going to admit it" not guilty plea. Just "yeah I did it."

I'd say this boggles my mind but it really doesn't. I think this guy got way in over his head and now is, like a gentlemen, taking the blame. Given this guy obviously missed a few of the bomb making classes (fireworks? Really? Timothy McVeigh took more care in constructing his own bomb) he has also cooperated with investigators, spilling the beans on all he knows. He is facing live in prison, but I think that is justifiable given his intent and the fact that he failed. We.Got.Lucky. The next person they find to do his type of job will be better, and we had better be prepared for this.

Merry Solstice and Happy Father's Day

So I didn't get a chance to post more junk pics because I still stuck raw eggs when taking pictures (and trying to not look like I'm taking them, lest I piss off the junk pile owners) so I'll have to get back to that at a later date.

I hope everyone had a nice Father's Day. I did, though it is still marked by the fact that my own father is still of ill health (mentioned here, here, here, here, and finally here). Sores are now on both feet. Really worried about how all of this will play out. But on a brighter note I did give my old laptop to him. Even put an Atari emulator on it, so he can play checkers (which he has held the breakage of said cartridge over my head for years). All in all good family times.

Also warm wishes and a merry summer solstice. Though the weather here is a bit dreary right now (64F and cloudy), the June Gloom should clear by the afternoon. Can't believe it's summer already. Can't wait to hit the beach more. The Twins, as they are, will be out in full force, if evidence of my trip to the beach a few weeks again was any indication. ^_^

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Stuff the Shamwow guy wouldn't sell

So you wouldn't know it but I go to the OC Fairgrounds quite a bit, but it's mostly on the weekend for and out-of-the-way grocers market where I score quite a bit of deals on fruits and vegtables. So today I fill up my backpack to the brim and then some (Fair is closed next weekend so I needed to stock up) and I decided to check out the other booths.

Now I decided today to peruse the rest of The Marketplace, as it's called and I came upon and old favorite: there's several locations I call The Junk Pile and The Kitchen Junk Pile. The Junk Piles have cheap crap, just in cardboard boxes ranging in price from $1-5 dollars, depending on what the operators think the stuff is worth. Kitchen Junk Piles have just as much junk, but they're on shelves and cost more and are, by their name, used for the kitchen.

I decided today to take some pictures and show you just how odd some of this crap is. Let's take a look shall we? (Note: Most of my pictures from my camera came out crappy, so I plan on going back to get some more tomorrow. The spot I get my food from, Bruce's Produce, gives away free passes to The Marketplace if you
buy enough. I got two passes today, and my back hurts from hauling all that home in my backpack >_<)

First item is from an aforementioned Junk Pile stop. 'Specually Bath Belt' is the best engrish I seen in a while. Also more than mildy ecchi as well. Strategically placed bubbles keep it from going full hentai. What can't be seen in my pic is that this is basically a plastic washcloth, with material that looks more like a kitchen scrubber than anything I'd use on my body for bathing purposes. My guess is that those are soap bubbles, but clouds of skin ripped off by used of this thing. Not recommended, even if it is only a buck.

Next, from the Kitchen Junk, are cute little mini whisks made to look like pigs. While PigglyWiggly is how I first read it, there are no Ls in this. But, then again, a nursery rhyme about going home without supper is also not the best association to have about something used to prepare food.


Not content with just having a bagel cutter? Why not execute the sonofabitch with this sleek little device. Maybe the bagel had subversive thoughts? Murdered the cream cheese? Was looking to cause a Muffin Revolution? Yep, time to kill it in on swift move.



If I'm going to be barbecuing, I'd want more that 6 patties. But I do have to give props where they are due, as this would be the least worthless crap I found at the Kitchen Crap today. I could totally see the commercial for something like this. Oh wait, there is something similar, but only does 5 small patties:


Last but not lease I have a question to ask. Exactly at what size do they become cake rather than cupcake? I mean seriously.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Another great video of the day

Best Lady Gaga cover EVER!

Yes I'm Evil ^_^

Am I the only one that doesn't give a shit?

I'm going to go out on a limb here (and some much catch a small pun there ^_^) and speak my mind on something: I don't care that the Lakers won. Actually, when it comes to sports I, to quote, "frankly don't give a damn" about professional sports.

I just don't know why. I have actually tried to sit down and want to watch a game of any sport and... I just get bored. There's nothing there that holds my attention. Unless things go bad. A good example would be the last World Cup. You know, the one where this asshole decided to disrespect his game and headbutt a player over some harsh words? I was housesitting for my sister at the time and decided to watch the game. Worst.Mistake.Ever.

But I see my disgust for pro-sports everwhere. Do they honestly deserve the millions they get paid? In my opinoin, no. But I'm a minority. I can sit in front of a comptuer for hours on one game and get just as much enjoyment. I just wish I didn't have to hear my neighbors while last nights game was going on. Hearing shouts of 'Oh come on you motherfucker' loud enough for my whole apartment complext to hear is NOT my idea of an enjoyable evening. Sorry, no.

Chaos Ramblings

<<Cross posting from LiveJournal>>

Ok so this is going to be a weird ass post. I was half asleep last night when this happened but still awake enough to remember it. Sometimes when I'm lying in bed I tend to start day dreaming (a misnomer, as it is usually night) about things. Some things that come up are profound enough to jump me out of bed to write them down. I think it has to do with a loose mental state or something.

So anyways I'm sitting in front of a chessboard with with someone (Editing Note: I'd explain more, but both the chessboard and person are insignificant to this post so I omitting them) trying in futility to get them to understand my way of thinking. So I think to myself "what is chaos" and my answer is "I don't know, because there is no true chaos in this world"

Waitafuckingminute, what? Yes, no true chaos. Lets say I pick up a single grain of sand and drop it on to the board. Fine, we won't know truly where it will land or how it might roll afterwords. However, this is not a chaotic as it may seem. The laws of physics dictate exactly where it will fall. Mind you the variables of speed, friction from air, momentum, and the transfer of energy to the air and board are themselves so complex as to take a single computer model years to calculate. However, you can eventually calculate it. And there in lies my definition of true chaos.

In a truly chaotic state the grain of sand would so much fall down and hit the board. The minute you let it go... on moment it is there, the next in Egypt, next floating somewhere outside Alpha Centauri (yes I've been playing that game again), and so on. The real question become 'will the sand ever reach the board?' A better one is 'how can this universe exist with matter moving all over the place?'

It can't exist. We live in a world of ordered chaos. We are patterns in chaos, you and I. We exist because there are exactly 4 forces holding all the shit together. It's an amazing thing when you really understand the scope of it. ^_^ (and yes I'm excluding string theory here for the purpose of a cohesive argument)

Ok so enough of that. I'm probably going to make everyone's brain bleed if I continue ^_^

Returning

So I'm just going to pick up this blog and just run with it again. I'm not looking for format, just dumb ramblings, reviews, thoughts. Next post'll be a weird one. I guess I'll turn this into a more public version of my livejournal/dreamwidth account. Fun cross posting MADNESS!