Programming Bugs (not what you think it is)

Not many may know this but I have this thing I call the "Programming Bug". It's like an itch that must, I mean must be scratched, only in computer form. It's one of those moments where a small part of my brain says "you must make this program... I WILL YOU TO MAKE THIS NOW", and I become kinda helpless unless I obey.

In passing, my grandmother's obituary

Lorene Pannell Choate Ill, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother and sister, is a new angel, received by the heavens Monday Jan. 9, 2012. She is being met by her family with open arms as she was the key to our family. Service: 10 a.m. Friday at Blessing Funeral Home. Interment: Pleasant Point Cemetery. Visitation: 6 to 8 p.m. Thursday at Blessing. She was born Aug. 27, 1931, in Kennedale as the oldest of nine children. Her parents were Susie Mae Lawler Pannell and Hubert Condor Pannell. Lorene lived most of her life in the Metroplex. She worked in the food service area at various locations in Fort Worth, such as the old Texas Hotel, Don Carter's Bowling Alley, The Lonestar Drive-In and Ramada Inn. Her last job before retirement was at the Walmart in Mansfield, where she worked in the fabric area. Lorene was an avid bowler. She bowled at Meadowbrook Lanes for many years. When the new Don Carter's Bowling Alley opened, she bowled on many different leagues over the years. She was a member of the Ladies Traveling League for many years and traveled to a different bowling lane each month. Her time was spent watching soap operas and keeping up with all her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She was always doing some kind of needlework, either embroidery or crochet. She was a born gambler. If you said Las Vegas or Shreveport, she was ready to go. She got her numbers every week for the Lotto, Mega Millions, Pick 3 and Pick 4. Lorene got excited just because she won $3 on one of her tickets. Lorene was preceded in death by her sons, Mark Randall Choate and Carl William Choate Jr.; and husbands, Bill Choate and Pete Ill. Survivors: Daughters, Joyce LaHue and husband, John, of Alvarado, Debra J. Sandefur and husband, Clyde, of Bakersfield, Calif., and Barbara G. Allen of Shelbyville, Tenn.; sons, Steven Choate of Wolfe City and Douglas Choate of Midwest, Okla.; daughter-in-law, Shelah Choate of Garland; brothers, Edwin Pannell and wife, Jo, of Vallejo, Calif., Tommy Pannell and wife, Lynn, of Joshua and Dan Pannell and wife, Merilea, of Weatherford; 23 grandchildren; and 30 great-grandchildren.

Lorene Pannell Choate Ill Obituary: View Lorene Ill's Obituary by Star-Telegram

Sadness in Passing

So late last evening Granny was taken off her life support and was woken up. Against certain odds for a while she was doing well. There was talk even of moving her from her nursing home back to the hospital to be cared for better.

That hope, sadly, passed. Though some miscommunication we'd received the word hours before the event actually happened. However, as of an hour ago, she passed on. I will miss my Granny, Susie Lorene Pannell dearly, and for the rest of my own life.

Feeling Sad

For as long as I can remember I've only had one grandparent, Granny Lorene. On my mother's side my grandfather died 6 or so years before I was born. My paternal grandmother as well passed before I was born. I have a single memory of Granpa Sandefur (again on my father's side). I had to have been 2 or 3 and remembered looking up at this tall man that had the whitest hair I'd seen to date. I mean STARK white. And all I could think of was, at this young age, "Who is this guy with white hair and why does he talk to me so much?" No, really, I remember that feeling. Again, however, this was a fleeting image in my mind, as he died before I really was able to bond and form memories with him.

So this leaves but the mother of my mother: Granny Lorene. Don't you dare call her Grandmother, it was Granny. I don't know what I can say about her without having to take a year to fill pages upon pages. Sadly that's time I don't have. I got the call at 11:30am today, a sunny Sunday morning in Arizona. The past 3 years or so Granny has been in a nursing home due to her pulmonary problems. This past weekend an email went out that she was being put on a respirator due to a bout of pneumonia. And now.... she's being taken off the machine and most likely will not make it through the night.

I'm sitting here in my dorm room right now. I closed the blinds and put on some jazz (thank you Spotify) and have been trying to pick up my brain to write this in between fits of sobbing. When a mainstay in your life, the fact that you have a grandparent at least. When something like this comes down the line the stress it causes... I will be fine, if only because I still have other family and friends to see me through.