We can has recession now?

Are we finally able to admit it now? And by we, I mean economists, since I'm pretty fucking sure most of America nay the world has realized this for the past 3 months now. BOHICA, as the saying goes, because its going to get worse before we recover. Dow Jones under 9k (~20% drop this week) and now a global effort to keep credit out there for companies to use.

Folks, I've tried keeping my head up about all of this but the only way I can see anyone keeping money in the current economical state is buying stock in KY and barbed dildo manufacturers.